Pre-Race History:
My training was exactly where it needed to be. I was on track to run the Tulsa Half Marathon November 27, 2012 and then the plan was to continue to build for the OKC Memorial Marathon in April, 2013. I had big goals and they were shattered. In a matter of weeks I went from being in the best shape of my life to not being able to walk. I was terrified. This happened to me in 2009. Doctors were stunned. How could this happen again? What was it? I was given several different diagnoses and treated for some. Specialists would agree then disagree. I was drowning in medication.
I wanted answers and I wanted to be well, but most of all I wanted to run. I wanted to train. I begged God for it...even it was hard, I just wanted to run.
For months I lived in hospitals and doctors offices. I waited for the day I was told I was well enough to start training. That day came. Training was slow. It was harder than when I first started running. We had to be careful. I had to be patient, and I am not a patient person. I knew racing was out of the question. My heart wasn't ready yet. I trusted my coach to tell me when I was ready. And when I was ready, he did. I was ecstatic. The plan was to run the 9/11 Heroes run on September 14.
Then life happened. The six weeks leading up to my race I got a new coach, both of my parents were sick and required surgery, migraines were still too frequent, and training was not consistent. I wasn't sure I could run 3.1 miles. A week before the race I told my coach we needed to talk, I was having reservations about the race. The night we were to talk, her son needed her so we rescheduled. I thank God for Ty and his need that night. The next day I had the best run in almost a year.
Thank you Ty, you are an angel.
We decided I would go to the race and just have a free run. No time goal. No pressure. The only goal was to have fun and remember why I run. I could do that.
I am not sure why but the entire week before I was super nervous. You would have thought I was going to run a marathon and not a 5k. The day before the race my emotions got the best of me and in that moment, God so sweetly said, "go hard." I immediately sent this email to my coach:
This may be crazy and even stupid but I hope you will understand...I need to change my race plan.
Free run it will be...but I can't sit back and take it easy. I asked God to give me the hard over nothing...and this has every bit been hard coming back the last 9 months. I need to give it all I have, even if it hurts. I asked for this, to stand at a race start again, so I feel like I have to give it all I have. No time in mind, no chasing a PR...just me and God.
It's a 5k and just another race for many, but this is much more for me. It would be my story if I played it safe, but it's his story and that means going after it-being a little uncomfortable. It may be a 40 minute run or a 29 min run giving me a PR. Either way, I just have to give it all I have. I come to this because God reminded me why I run. That was the original goal right ? ;)
Stay tuned for Part 2: Race Day
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